Recent Comments

1/2/23, 4:20 PM
Thank you all for the positive comments!! Chapter 2 is mostly done just needs some minor edits and proofreading! Stay tuned :)

Lampshade15
1/2/23, 8:00 PM
@[cheekyjockboy](/user/show/908783) Can't wait!

Chase
1/3/23, 5:36 AM
Love this story. Definitely reading anything you write from now on. Thanks and can’t wait for me 🔥😘
Anonymous
1/3/23, 4:38 AM
Hot, love when they are oblivious
1/3/23, 4:06 AM
This is exceptional.
1/3/23, 4:01 AM
It is great to see you writing again.
nycboot
1/3/23, 3:14 AM
So good to see you back!
Cigar lov4
1/3/23, 3:11 AM
Can I be in the gang pls
1/3/23, 1:58 AM
I love that name... I have a friend named alec so it is really fitting :shushing_face: :wink:
1/3/23, 1:53 AM
Aha, but you're forgetting I'm _exactly_ the guy who would literally **ruin** his own story to put an old guy into it, for no narrative reason, so long I can make said old guy get humiliated, used, or forced into sex (in this instance, by an aggressive young centaur). Ah no, :grin: point taken. The old coot _did_ help express exactly how much hornier-than-expecting the centaur found himself (and I'd've been less comfy using Fred for that *aswell*) Like, I felt comfier using poor Holst as the 'Star trek red shirt' who existed mostly to express "centaur is very sex aggressive." I can envision a "Cockatrice" version of this without Holst and it would work perfectly well with only minúte changes. It would be more unified and to the point. As ever, thanks for the read.
1/3/23, 1:18 AM
Really enjoyed the story. Especially loved the twist at the end. It gave Brandon some much needed agency and tied the whole thing together into a causative chain. Really nice. I also really liked your characters and how you introduced them. Isaac's introduction was hilarious but told us quite a bit about his "world" so to speak, and introducing Brandon together with his father did the same for him. Okay, I'll stop summarizing the story haha. But yes, I liked that each of your characters had clearly defined and separated personalities. (We talked about this in DM. So I'm not going too much into detail here.) One aspect I didn't quite like and found both unnecessary and a little bit upsetting to the narrative itself was the whole thing with the professor Holst. It adds a darker element to it that requires a more delicate touch and also didn't gel with any of the character motivations. It would have been much easier and less risky to find a date on grindr and Holst had so much to lose. Personally I would have merged Holts and Fred into one character and have him be Isaac's go-to jerk-off buddy. That aside I really liked the story and its characters and might reread again in the future. :)
1/3/23, 1:14 AM
Sounds like Rick will be just fine when Ryan goes back to school. Hopefully we’ll hear about his time with the lacrosse player.