Recent Comments

1/3/23, 4:01 AM
It is great to see you writing again.
nycboot
1/3/23, 3:14 AM
So good to see you back!
Cigar lov4
1/3/23, 3:11 AM
Can I be in the gang pls
1/3/23, 1:58 AM
I love that name... I have a friend named alec so it is really fitting :shushing_face: :wink:
1/3/23, 1:53 AM
Aha, but you're forgetting I'm _exactly_ the guy who would literally **ruin** his own story to put an old guy into it, for no narrative reason, so long I can make said old guy get humiliated, used, or forced into sex (in this instance, by an aggressive young centaur). Ah no, :grin: point taken. The old coot _did_ help express exactly how much hornier-than-expecting the centaur found himself (and I'd've been less comfy using Fred for that *aswell*) Like, I felt comfier using poor Holst as the 'Star trek red shirt' who existed mostly to express "centaur is very sex aggressive." I can envision a "Cockatrice" version of this without Holst and it would work perfectly well with only minúte changes. It would be more unified and to the point. As ever, thanks for the read.
1/3/23, 1:18 AM
Really enjoyed the story. Especially loved the twist at the end. It gave Brandon some much needed agency and tied the whole thing together into a causative chain. Really nice. I also really liked your characters and how you introduced them. Isaac's introduction was hilarious but told us quite a bit about his "world" so to speak, and introducing Brandon together with his father did the same for him. Okay, I'll stop summarizing the story haha. But yes, I liked that each of your characters had clearly defined and separated personalities. (We talked about this in DM. So I'm not going too much into detail here.) One aspect I didn't quite like and found both unnecessary and a little bit upsetting to the narrative itself was the whole thing with the professor Holst. It adds a darker element to it that requires a more delicate touch and also didn't gel with any of the character motivations. It would have been much easier and less risky to find a date on grindr and Holst had so much to lose. Personally I would have merged Holts and Fred into one character and have him be Isaac's go-to jerk-off buddy. That aside I really liked the story and its characters and might reread again in the future. :)
1/3/23, 1:14 AM
Sounds like Rick will be just fine when Ryan goes back to school. Hopefully we’ll hear about his time with the lacrosse player.
1/3/23, 12:11 AM
Wowee. My 'Daddy Bear' challenge tag was in good hands it seems. Quick storytelling, no hanging about, and an excellent 'conceptual' merger of the three tags. Pleasantly surprised. Well executed. Loved the brevity. :thumbsup:
Martin
1/2/23, 10:32 PM
Why has it to stop now? I want to know what's happening to Colton....