Recent Comments

11/2/22, 12:34 AM
I really liked this story. I found the beginning dragged out a little bit too much, but you got me hooked once the ceremony started. That part really glued me to my seat as I wanted to know whether Holden's preparations paid off. And what these preparations even were. The flashbacks to Holden's preparations worked, you managed to make it clear this happened before, but I find it good practise to make it as foolproof as possible that it happened in the past. Again, you made it work, but I did reread a paragraph just to double check that I was right in assuming it was a flashback. When Holden and Havoc were talking in his head at the same time it was difficult to follow who was talking. I got the gist after a while, but I wish the mental dialog was treated like proper dialog. For this very reason I often intersperse actions or thoughts of a person during dialog to let the reader know who is talking while avoiding the "he said she said" ugliness. Wish that had been done here as well. If you let me nerd out for a moment: The real life refernces are a double edged sword. Personally I try to keep it to a minimum or avoid it entirely, but I realize it's a matter of personal preference. _However_, the tome is older than the binomial name Ferula drudeana. Ancient texts wouldn't have called it that, and since you stayed true to the real world, it is not proven to be Silphium either. An extremely minor nitpick, I know, but still. One more thing, I found the end a bit disappointing. I did not expect a cliffhanger. The way I see it no arc has been concluded, not Havoc's and Holden's, not Evermore's and not the order's existence. While the story did end in a different place from where it started it did not resolve anything. All in all, this was a very enjoyable read (despite a slow start) and I am looking forward to part 2. (You gotta.)

11/2/22, 3:31 AM
@[Cockatrice](/user/show/620105) Thank you so much for the feedback! I'm glad that there were parts of the story that you enjoyed. I appreciate your perspectives on pacing, flashbacks, and dialogue, but personally disagree and trust the reader with the signposts that are there. From one nerd to another: I actually already knew all about binomial nomenclature, the different opinions around whether Ferula drudeana is Silphium, and so on. I decided that in my fictional little world, Ferula drudeana *is* Silphium, that it has been called Ferula drudeana for a long time, and that this Chaos Demon hated it and tried to destroy it. It made for a more interesting story to me and allowed me to play with the meaning of the Latin. So, this was a deliberate choice. To me, the arc of this story was the question of whether or not Holden would become possessed by Havoc. I am definitely planning for a sequel, but still told the story that I wanted to tell here. Thanks again -- it's so great to hear your thoughts. I'll be working on that sequel~! <3
Anonymous
11/2/22, 1:38 AM
Waaaay too dark, one sided and opportunistic. I'm hoping you have a "table turning" or some redemption or equalizer in store

11/2/22, 3:24 AM
It’s the 3rd part of many. He will get what’s coming to him don’t you worry ;)
11/2/22, 2:55 AM
THANK YOU, Darby!! Appreciate your comments & encouragement!! I am humbled to deliver a storyline that you & the other readers/group members can/will ENJOY!! Believe me, I've got MORE in store for SUPERMAN!!:wink:
11/2/22, 2:43 AM
Great Work!!! I Want More!!!
11/2/22, 2:13 AM
Very Interesting and very excited for this!
Nov 16, 2005
Anonymous
11/2/22, 12:56 AM
Excellent story mmade me so yearning for sex!
Dylan
11/2/22, 12:41 AM
I am sure you might also find chapters 23 and 24 interesting, as parts of a trilogy. How do you like the picture story approach?
Anonymous
11/2/22, 12:35 AM
Such a hot story! Would love to hear about who else Oscar has transformed in his studio
Sebastián Apollo
11/1/22, 8:57 PM
Hey, I know this a lil' late, but I was just introduced to your works through "Graduation Present Gone Wrong", and spent the last day reading through all of Ethan's other adventures. Just wanted to say really good job! Ethan is loveable and fuckable at the same time, and you do a superb job making the big lug play off well against the cast of characters you've introduced throughout each installment. I was cracking up because I could just envision each scene in my head like a movie, like the slow panning out of the officer getting dicked down by Ethan as he, red-faced, tries to scribble details on his notepad. Very good work!

11/2/22, 12:03 AM
Let me tell you something, @[Sebastián Apollo](/user/show/10029736), as a vain and desperately affirmation-seeking author: no compliment _ever_ comes too late :grin: Thank you for taking the time to let me know you’ve enjoyed the series! I’m very glad it pushed your buttons. There’s more Ethan on the way, starting with whatever antics he gets up to with an up-and-cumming baseball star. Stay tuned :eyes: