Recent Comments

6/27/22, 11:37 PM
Nice start. I liked the gradual transformation and I did actually like the butt on the seat. Kinda wish he had kept that, haha. I'm also really glad he kept his face. I love transformations that keep the face or at least mouth intact. Personally not a fan of painful transformations and the unwillingness, but that's personal preference I suppose. On a structural note I found the story hard to read at times due to the large blocks of text and the lack of quotation marks in most cases. It was difficult to tell who was talking at times. You can ask on the discord for someone to proofread, there's usually someone to help you out. There's even a proofreader role, so you can quickly find someone who is up for doing that. I would really suggest you do that. A minor complaint is that there were a ton of technical words regarding motor cycles that I didn't know, but depending on who this story is for that may be a me problem, haha.

6/28/22, 1:44 AM
@Cockatrice Thank you very much.
Anonymous
6/28/22, 1:38 AM
Good story! Parts of it made me laugh out loud, especially in chapters 1 and 2
6/28/22, 12:39 AM
That's one intense edging scene!
6/28/22, 12:32 AM
The edging procedure ... 'nuff said! Very hot.
6/28/22, 12:16 AM
So I don't know if your planning this sort of thing or not but the idea of say one of the members is gay or forced into or whatever could be nice. Won't save him from becoming transformed but it might make things nicer. Like honestly I could imagine the bartender being kept away from things so he doesn't come under suspicion. I've read this chapter like three times now. So sexy.

6/28/22, 12:32 AM
@Heru Kane I'm so glad you enjoyed! Part 2 just needs some tweaks, and I think you'll be quite happy with the content!
Anonymous
6/28/22, 12:26 AM
Solid story concept, and from an abstract standpoint the sequence of events is good too, but the end is a bit of a sudden fizzle, and a lot of editing would be helpful. Also, how in the world does a knight who clearly knows nothing about magic know "there's no way you could get them to pretend to be the men they were before"? Could be a very solid story if rewritten, because it has good bones.
6/28/22, 12:10 AM
Well Rusty wants Dusty to make changes, so either changing his own or Carter’s character sheet gives Dusty the opportunity to take an initiative. This could really mix things up.
6/28/22, 12:02 AM
I generally don't go for stories set in a radically imaginary fictional world -- but this story is super-hot! You've included JUST enough foreshadowing to get me thinking about the very ... ummm... INTERESTING things that are likely to happen to Noel! Can't wait to read more!
6/27/22, 6:30 PM
An incredibly hot start to what I hope is a nicely long series! I loved our protagonist's kind of justice and what he has done with his first victims and I can't wait to see what he does with a group of feral beats like them. Can't wait for him to claim more slaves and get his plan going!

6/28/22, 12:00 AM
@Essex glad you enjoyed! I've got the second installment mostly done, and am toying around with whether I want a more intimate interlude before jumping up the food chain a bit.
6/27/22, 10:55 PM
A nice start of a larger narrative. Let's see where this goes. I've got to admit my first read on Janus was that he came across as a bit manipulative. Not sure if this is intended or if it's just me, seeing as others are saying he is sweet/adorable, so mmh.