Recent Comments

6/10/22, 4:25 AM
I honestly wrote this solely because Thanos is a very sexy bastard and only one person is writing him. RotherhamMan-senpai please notice me.
6/10/22, 4:04 AM
I love how all your stories have substories that have their own beginning and conclusion that parallels the main character’s own transformation/change.
6/10/22, 1:00 AM
Nooooo! Chapter one was perfect! Sigh. Is this revenge when I said chapter one is the best earlier? I like romance in my Hypno fics and chapter Larry is really good mix of lonely, amoral but human person. He even let his thrall hypnotize him. Unlike pryer who is a carbon cut out evil master type. God pryer is such a turn off.

nycboot
6/10/22, 2:36 AM
@Harolf and @Piko That's the other thing about this story which I find way too mechanical and predictable (just like Re-Educator). If Pryer just goes on and on - there is no drama or story in that. It's just one sexual conquest after another and that gets boring - no, very boring. Even if you eventually have a denouement where Pryer gets knocked down a peg, that still leaves a very unbalanced story. If you're going to have many chapters dealing with Pryer's increasing power, a single chapter bringing him down won't cut it. You have to plant the seeds of the takedown over the course of chapters. That creates tension and drama (again I cite the off-quoted Hitchcock principle between surprise (an unexpected event) and tension when the audience expects something to happen but that characters are oblivious to it.

6/10/22, 3:32 AM
@nycbootr Respectfully, I disagree about this story being boring. If you don't like the structure the writer laid out that's fine, but I'm giving my thoughts on why I think it's rather exciting writing to balance it out: I love these stories, especially when written by talented writers like Edlam. In every other popular media, the villains eventually lose or at least get some comeuppance by the end. In these stories the villain keeps on winning... succeeds in his perversions... and this time nothing is coming to stop him. Is it a bit predictable that Edlam's villain is going to win in the end? Sure. But that's only because I've read Edlam's _other_ work. What's happening to these poor characters is still pretty shocking and to me, psychologically erotic. Plus, who thought the Professor was going to end up Power-Bottoming like that? There have been surprises in each chapter and the the writer is challenging himself to write scenes from two entirely different perspectives. Calling it Boring, to me, sort of feels like telling a writer not to follow their desired path for their story, which I don't think we want Edlam or any of the hard working writers here to think. All in good spirits, but since we're discussing things nicely here I thought I'd share my thoughts as well. Cheerio!
6/6/22, 7:40 AM
Oh wow! So sweet and wholesome! More! I demand more immediately!

6/10/22, 3:19 AM
@Norismo so glad you read this one! And didn't tell me! Getting through next episode and will have it this weekend for sure!
6/10/22, 3:16 AM
I WANT THIS DONE TO MEEEEEEEE
6/10/22, 2:30 AM
Regardless of how people enjoyed the plot or not, purely just looking at the discussion that it has stirred, I think this story can already claim success and fame! Not only did it gave us sexual or fantasy pleasures, it also made many of us become invested in the emotional and moral side of things, even if only briefly. That is just literary art! :wink: A round of applause and praise to Edlam for his masterful writing skills that I think has gone up another level with this story! :clap::clap::clap::+1::+1::+1:
6/8/22, 3:04 AM
I had to search to find this. It needs to be finished :) Hot story, smart writing and wacky, sexy hijinx must continue! At least, I’d love it if they continued :)

6/9/22, 8:53 PM
Are you reading my mind, @MonsterMash62?? I literally (finally) started on the next chapter last night! I’m still the same streaky writer I’ve ever been, so we’ll see how long it takes. But it’s in progress!

6/9/22, 10:58 PM
@Noam de Pluma Awesome to hear. The huge sweeping changes to the world are incredibly hot and I’d love to read about a few more world changes. Or just explore the current one. Thanks for continuing!

6/10/22, 2:03 AM
@MonsterMash62 I'm excited for this one too!
mikegay4u
6/10/22, 1:22 AM
I think it's one of the hottest stories I've ever read. I've been reading porn all of my adult life and a lot of different versions of story themes. This one has a bit of a twist I've never read before. Excellent. Looking forward to reading more of your stuff. Cheers.
marc frank
6/10/22, 12:57 AM
this was an interesting idea
Anonymous
6/10/22, 12:54 AM
nice