Recent Comments

5/21/22, 9:24 AM
edlam you back!
5/21/22, 8:55 AM
Interesting start! I'm looking forward to see what happens next!
Anonymous
5/21/22, 8:20 AM
NICE! Cant wait for the next chapters! Hope u update this immediately!
Kent
5/21/22, 8:03 AM
I don’t want Carter to get lost!!! He’s so likable…down with rusty. Confront Rusty
5/21/22, 7:43 AM
So well written as always. I can't wait to see what happens next though please don't make us wait a year!
5/21/22, 7:25 AM
Continue storyline, More
Jay
5/21/22, 7:15 AM
This was a really sweet story and a joy to read! Hope it all works out well for Ryder & Jeremy :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:
5/21/22, 4:44 AM
This was fun (and it's always a pleasure to see hypnotized Chat Noir). Short, sweet, and well executed. Nice work.
Sep
5/21/22, 4:18 AM
Thanks for the input, I went back and correct most of the verb tenses, so I hope it makes more sense.
5/21/22, 3:32 AM
You definitely captured the theme of the contest with this one! I thought it was clever how you used the jocks' comments to reveal the "rules" of the changes. And although I got worried for a sec when Alex asked his last question, it was good to see how Colin reacted and how that changed things. A very interesting method of reality change, using agreement and conformity as part of it! I will say, see if you can get some practice or an editor's help on your use of tenses—you flew around a bunch toward the beginning when you were writing the lead-up. But once the actual scene was going, you used the past tense consistently! You asked how to make it hotter—I don't get off to reality change stories myself, but from what I've heard from friends, reality changes that involve a change to the person are hottest when you describe the change _happening_. Take that with a grain of salt, because sudden realisations can be fun, too. I think bluesuedewho's [_Magic Textbook_](https://www.gaykinkystories.com/series/show/10000971) is a well-loved work, and a standard-setter, in the reality change arena, so you can likely pick up some cues from there for your future writing endeavours. For a first work this shows good promise, and I wish you the best of luck writing more! EDIT: I forgot to add how fucking _clever_ that title is. Genius.