Recent Comments

Anonymous
10/22/21, 5:37 PM
Love this series, very well done
10/22/21, 3:21 PM
I absolutely love this idea!!! I kinda wish he'd put up more of a fight somehow, but it was still a pretty nice read and a very clever way to showcase it

10/22/21, 3:45 PM
Thanks @Hinner! I was tempted to write some “No dude… I need my smarts…” dialog, but I wanted to make it really clear that once he realized the truth, Charlie *wanted* to be dumb.
10/22/21, 2:50 PM
Really clever story as usual, Derek. I was just hoping we'd get some scenes of him interacting with his dumbed-down friends. This is just my personal taste, but for me the story would be hotter if there was no Mr. Monroe character and it was Charlie's friends who used their "dumb jock logic" to persuade him that being smart was dumb.

10/22/21, 3:43 PM
Thanks @Hypnothrill - that’s an interesting take on the concept too. Might make a good story, though certainly very different from what I went with. I’m pretty fond of the “duel with the devil” style of conflict myself.
10/22/21, 3:27 PM
I am hooked on Donnie vs Superboy! Awesome story. I was just wondering if you'd ever write a chapter (or another story) where Donnie meets Tommy? I'd love to read about them fighting and trying to dominate each other. Thanks for the great story!
10/22/21, 10:55 AM
Your English skills are great and I enjoyed your story, the writing is good overall. However, you did make some easy to fix errors owing to your unfamiliarity with the setting. Your story would work in most places in the U.S. but it absolutely doesn't work in New York City. In the future, you could try being more generic with your setting. You don't need to name the city, and if you do, you should research the city online so you can get the feel of it for your story. New York City doesn't have mobile homes, normal people can't even afford a house in NYC it's far too expensive, no one would ever loan someone money in NYC like what happend in your story because you will never see a stranger you bumped into again because it's too massive, and there are too many people. New York City is almost a character unto itself in fiction and literature, so it should not be chosen casually as a setting for the story if the writer isn't prepared to evoke the feel of that city. Your story would have worked better in any small town in America.
10/22/21, 8:50 AM
I live to Serve the Virus
Unknown
10/22/21, 6:37 AM
This would be good if he'll be a Top slave
Anonymous
10/22/21, 5:35 AM
Sounds like it's interesting, I'd be down to try
Anonymous
10/21/21, 5:58 AM
Amazing! Will we be seeing Sam in his pole dancing classes? And since there are two models in each class, plus tutoring, will we see him gaining knowledge through sex? I can also see him "accidentally" intentionally make an edit in the heat of the moment he would regret...if he didn't enjoy it too much!

10/21/21, 4:55 PM
Thanks! There will definitely be some pole dancing at some point. I honestly have more ideas than I can realistically fit into the planned story without derailing the plot. I'm thinking I'll probably write some "bonus chapters." I already have one in the works from Marc's perspective. @

10/22/21, 4:24 AM
@bluesuedewho Oh this really excites me! Can't wait to read!
Anonymous
10/22/21, 3:02 AM
Really enjoying this series!!!