Recent Comments

Anonymous
9/28/21, 1:29 AM
Masterful writing as always. It astounds me how good you are at personality shifts- even though it didn't seem to be the primary focus this time, there to facilitate the plot and the theming (*Jacob being so envious of others/unable to value his own traits he willingly replaces his own personality, and isn't alarmed when the first changes affect his thoughts and mannerisms*) it was still what I found hottest. And even if our hero didn't lose *intelligence*, his utter lack of personal identity at the end is a delightfully ironic echo of the way he was afraid of being brainwashed into being a himbo. The plot and theming is also very fun, and rather than conflict, the eroticism in the story only makes its presentation and message more compelling- focusing on the sexual appeal of others bodies and behaviors, and outright **encouraging** the reader towards lusting over model-standard men makes it much easier to relate to Jacob, whereas a SFW story would have a hard time showing it understands where he's coming from and not making him out as a strawman. Lastly, since you mentioned the foreshadowing: it's enough to give you a pretty good guess what's happening while keeping you doubting the details. The law of conservation of detail made me sure that if the targets of lust were truly unaffected, they wouldn't have been shown reacting to the spell in panic, much less examining their bodies as if new in the end- but I just couldn't guess spirits imprisoned in the mirror were swapping places with them, because the artifact presented an united front in all but its "feed us" whisper.... drove myself nuts trying to guess what was happening to the guys. The closest I came was thinking they were being used as puppets for the mirror, but united under the will of only one spirit in there as a hive mind, and a hive mind that had no desire of fully abandoning its magic body, just wanting puppets.

9/29/21, 8:57 PM
Thanks! I'm pleased you noticed the personality shifts and the gradual replacement of Jacob. I was aiming for the idea that if you rebuild yourself to be what others are looking for in you, you may find yourself with nothing left. I hadn't consciously thought about encouraging the reader to lust over the model standards. One of the nice part of reading comments is finding out where you've been particularly clever in your writing. I'll be honest - I wasn't sure what I meant when I wrote the 'Feed us...' line first, but I'm happy with where it ended up. Sometimes I discover the story as I go, just the same way the readers do.
9/29/21, 6:21 PM
...ok, this is brilliant. Absolutely brilliant. A first-class study in gender, masculinity, what it means to be a man, and how macho gendering hurts EVERYONE. Fantastic work!
9/29/21, 6:17 PM
Such an odd story, but completely unique and unexpected.
9/29/21, 4:35 PM
great start! excited to see what happens next
9/29/21, 4:33 PM
Wow! I think the only thing I've ever inspired someone to do prior to this is block me on Tinder! I really enjoyed where you took the idea, but I'm a glutton - I wanted more. My wish would've been for it to have had more time to see things play out - I’d have loved to see Jafar’s plan slowly come to life... still, I really enjoyed it!
9/29/21, 1:19 PM
I like this and the subject you're exploring. A+.
9/29/21, 1:06 PM
I don’t usually like mind control, but I rated this one 5 for “didn’t give me an existential crisis and *also* hot.” It was super hot.
9/26/21, 1:47 AM
Very interesting. Will there be a part two

9/26/21, 6:44 AM
@Jonanator Yes! I like slow burn stories, but I'm not sure how far I'll take the regression.

9/26/21, 1:22 PM
@Norismo great, can't wait.

9/28/21, 2:36 PM
@Norismo to three, of course?!

9/28/21, 2:45 PM
@babiedboi i mean how involved it will be, how far to push the obvious AB/DL elements. I'm still tinkering with the next chapter. I figure this might be a 3 chapter story, or 5, or 10, or 20 😂

9/29/21, 10:58 AM
@Norismo Well honestly, with all the water he was drinking at dinner I was expecting him to have an accident. xD
9/28/21, 7:33 PM
This is a good story. Loved it, and can't wait for more. I agree with @Hypnothrill on the part about Adam's name changing to Hank, got very confused too.

9/29/21, 9:13 AM
@Jonanator Haha thanks I republished the correct name now
9/28/21, 2:46 PM
I like this--quite a unique premise! But I got a bit distracted when Adam's name changed to Hank halfway through the story. I also spent way too much time wondering how Ben could possibly live off a diet of just jock sweat.

9/29/21, 9:13 AM
@Hypnothrill omg im so sorry i didnt even catch that - i wrote this and then worked on something else and when my brain came back to it I completely forgot