Recent Comments

8/31/21, 9:00 PM
As the stepson got more and more sadistic my interest in the story waned, and I expect an ending that is just the stepdad having his life ruined. Particularly once it was revealed that the stepson's motivation was "he's bored".

9/15/21, 8:48 PM
@amul all I can say is that it's not as simple as Jay being "bored" but I revealed his motives and such in the prequel series.
Scotty
9/15/21, 7:54 PM
hope we're getting close! 😊
9/15/21, 11:46 AM
Is this really a mind control or hypnosis story at all? It just seems like the story of a uniform fetishist who gets off on wearing certain clothes, no hypnosis needed. If I were to make any suggestions, one would be to flesh out the character of Roy with more distinctive details; currently, he just seems like a cipher, and it's hard to understand his motivations. I'd also make the video more pivotal to the plot and introduce some kind of dramatic tension; maybe part of Roy wants to be hypnotized by the video, but another part is afraid of the total loss of control that would entail.

9/15/21, 7:44 PM
@Hypnothrill As always, thank you for reading and commenting on my work. I chose to go this route mostly to try to be different from the source material. The original has the video more for the pleasure of creator, so I guess my take is a reaction away from that. The plot does have more developing of Roy over time and I think the issues you're looking for are later dealt with. For now you just see him in this way. So if anything I'd say have patience with the work; those issues will come along as the story moves.
nycboot
9/15/21, 6:43 PM
Gads, why didn't the narrator asked the boy what's going on? We still don't know if the dog was turned into a boy or a boy turned into a dog, although I guess in the world of the story it's as simple as Googling for it. Great going so far! And even though there's not much narrative going on yet, it's enough to remind me of that story from a few years ago where to test out a power, someone kills a dog. That unfortunate author just didn't understand the nature of dogs in our culture. I'm glad here's a story that really expresses the special nature of dogs.

9/15/21, 7:09 PM
It could be, @nycboot that our protagonist is... a bit of an idiot. But I've tried to base this story in a parallel reality to ours, so as much as it might pain me to admit it... drop me into a situation like this; where logic isn't helping me... I might just turn to Google for answers! I'll agree, there's not much of a story here yet... it's based off a dream I had and I've fleshed it out. I have the story mapped out in my mind, but let's see if you all like it!
9/15/21, 6:55 PM
PLEASE PUBLISH THE NEXT PART SOON!
Sep 12, 2021
9/15/21, 6:07 PM
Extremely hot story, I had to register on this site just to congratulate you.
9/15/21, 12:17 AM
A dog to young man...that is the opposite of where it usually goes. Intriguing. I look forward to reading on. Woof! (and interesting that this is the first story I read with the new "Romance" ranking category. I laughed thinking how it's the first time and I'm rating a dog story. But thinking of the several tender moments you made between the character and the dog, resulted in a high ranking for the romance category.

9/15/21, 2:42 PM
Well @PupScout, I won't pretend it's a totally new concept, but yeah - a twist on an old classic. I'm trying to reach a balance of fantasy and reality in this story... if such a thing were to happen to the average bloke on the street, how would you handle it? Especially if the person your pet turns into turns you on. I'm not 100% sure where I'm going, but it's gonna be fun to find out. Thank you so much for your ratings, I genuinely appreciate them!
9/15/21, 2:11 PM
This has been adorable! Big fan.

9/15/21, 2:37 PM
Thank you so much, @GiveInToTheMusk ! Glad you're enjoying it.
9/15/21, 2:00 PM
good to see another rubber drone story on here, enjoyed it
9/15/21, 11:16 AM
Okay, there is a lot of reaction that seems a lot more... I guess logic is the word? Given the situation and what's happening. That does open the question of what? Jae is a figurehead now? The political power he holds or not is just confusing me now. I presume he has more limited power than we though... Okay. The small errors are here and there, nothing terrible. Lots of missing -s, some your/you/you're. Happen to everyone. But what does "on this walk" even means? Is that an expression? The couple... I like the fact they add a little feud over Dylan being too fast before quickly mending. That's something I feel happen to a lot of couples. Zane saying that Dylan has claim to him, in a way, that raised my eyebrow a little, but it's fine. I can imagine why he would think that way. Show that he actually don't mind the possessiveness. Differentiate him from Kai in the first story. A bit cute, thinking about it.

Jonanator
9/15/21, 11:21 AM
@BobbyBlobfish glad you like it so far. I'll post the next one later.