Recent Comments

9/7/21, 2:04 PM
Thank you, guys. I think I tend to go to a more elusive description, either they got this point or even physical description of the characters. Perhaps I write a prequel about the stud's conditioning at the Camp…

Ysuran
9/7/21, 6:04 PM
that i would love to read @topdog
9/7/21, 4:36 PM
I want to see the brother
9/7/21, 3:31 PM
ahhhhh been so long i love it heeheeh looking forwarf how this goes on from here
8/8/21, 1:07 PM
It has been so long....... i hope the updates comes sooner........ i really need to know what happens next and so on...

8/17/21, 5:49 AM
@Hypnobot - sorry for the wait... I been working on trying to finish something for the new site and I haven't finish the next chapter... will soon... please be patient 🙏

9/7/21, 2:50 PM
@Hypnobot – good news, I finally publish next chapter :3
Ysuran
9/7/21, 1:13 PM
Really enjoying the series, good setup so far, it will be interesting to see how the story goes forward. I look forward to reading future chapters and I hope more are on the way soon.
9/7/21, 1:11 PM
I read this in the morning and it made me so horny that I couldn't focus on my works in office all day.
Anonymous
9/7/21, 12:28 PM
the first couple of chapters of this story were great but the last few became so predictable, random person gets turned into hunky gay guy, that i lost complete interest by the end - there are so many other kinks and body types out there you could've explored, might want to consider changing up the transformations a bit to keep it interesting.

9/7/21, 12:44 PM
@ I did suggest something different, let see if he does it
9/7/21, 11:42 AM
Okay, bobby, you can do this, second story! And I have the feeling the writing had a step down? hear instead of here, some i, "hos name", interest in e"... (May I recommend getting a beta reader, at least for now? When I had a lot of issues writing in English, that's what I did) The relationship is more solid this time around, on the other hand. The fact it comes out so fast despite both characters wanting to know each other is a bit weird, but it can be used in plenty of ways. I think the biggest problem here, I didn't comment on it in the last chapters of the emperor and I, is that Marc seems to have done a 180 in term of characterization. He went from apparently genuine friend to self-destructive asshole without much build up. I don't know, it feel like you changed plans about him as you were writing. A lot of people do that, subplots are definitively subject to changes. It just comes off really badly because now it went from side story to part of the overall plot.

9/7/21, 11:47 AM
@BobbyBlobfish Yeah, as I said, this story did not um, turn out good, which is why I kind ended it early. I'm going to circle back to it at a later time, and try to redo it, after I get a good thought process with it. A lot of things were happening at the time, that, this one just slipped away from me. I probably will be posting a new chapter for the new story I'm working on, so, there's hope with that one, hopefully. Thanks again for the comment. I'll use them to help me refix this one.
9/6/21, 7:45 PM
Here I am again with a comment. So. 1) the writing is getting better! We have some incredible things (This chapter, half instead of have, a previous one had a = inside a word), but besides that, it's more fluid, the phrases are more English-sounding. The characters are starting to develop and the reactions are more natural, even if a bit rushed at times. 2) I do enjoy a lot more the main relationship. I still think some things are rushed over (trauma over almost being raped, where? It's a week later! with the first blow job even less.) but the couple is kind of cute. Having some scenes of honeymoon would have been wonderful to give them an identity outside of each other. I can't remember an hobby for either. (but given the fact this story is finished, take that as tips for your next ones). 3) As soon as Ian showed up, I though of Chloe from miraculous. For better and for worst (if you don't follow, she is very controversial in the fandom). Interesting. The side characters seem like they are real people, at least most of them. The ideas are starting to be more unique.

9/6/21, 8:12 PM
@BobbyBlobfish Thanks again for the comment. I like this story in the series and maybe the third that I'm working on more then the second one. I might redo that one in the future. I'll take your comments into account, and use them :)

9/7/21, 9:46 AM
@Jonanator Well, we all our preferences in what we wrote. I remember my first series on GSS, I kind of let it down unfinished, but I came back almost a year later to correct every errors I made. Re-doing the story is something some people do, can be very interesting to see how much your writing style changed. Happy that my comments are helping. They are critical, but I think there is a good story here, or I wouldn't be commenting.

9/7/21, 11:37 AM
@BobbyBlobfish Thanks for that, I really welcome it.
9/7/21, 11:03 AM
An obedient stud is always the best