Recent Comments

7/21/21, 11:18 PM
Slow burn with splendid denoument. Get outside my head, sistah! My inner skinpig stupidly grunts in appreciation.
5/9/21, 2:20 PM
A buff, manly, jock like Mike surely stops at the juice bar twice a day for his protein shakes. Just doing a bit of math… - average guy’s “load size” is 1 teaspoon, there are 48 teaspoons in a cup - Mike drinks a 2 cup (16oz shake) each day - 2000 men on the cruise, each dropping one load weekly in the juice bar “Fill Mike’s bro-tein” bucket - 2K ppl / 48 teaspoon = 41cups a week / 2 (drinks a 2 cup size) = 20 shakes a week - Mike’s 2 daily 32oz drinks x 7days = 224oz or almost 2 gallons (1.75) a week…if he works the cruise 2 weeks that’s a thirst-quenching 3.5 gallons he’ll have ingested. Keeping full-time clear and easy access to his puckered hole, Mike’s uniform of just his jockstrap didn’t stop him from complaining to the juice bar that his ‘regular’ protein shake tasked funny, demanding the employee give him a bigger banana for his shake. The employee picked the largest banana he could find, Mike with his hands full holding his tray piled with his breakfast and shake yelled “just how can I carry that?” The resourceful employee moved behind Mike and forced the dry, oversized fruit, completely up Mikes ass as he let out a whimper and walked away.

5/14/21, 4:26 AM
@jkstrapme hahaha love the math

Anonymous
7/21/21, 10:47 PM
@Nebulae hope all is well hope you've not given up on Mikes punishment. looking forward to the next chapter, soon? :)
7/21/21, 10:05 PM
can't wait for the conclusion of this story hypnothrill. I have really enjoyed this
Anonymous
7/21/21, 9:52 PM
Phenomenal
7/21/21, 9:45 PM
Definitely have to agree with Hypnothrill; good start but take some time to make the differences clearer. Especially as you put Noah in a different class by being taken over by the Master itself, the reader should know how Noah is different from all the other soldiers in the Hive mind. But please keep writing these types of story.
7/21/21, 9:23 PM
loved it! Any sequels or more chapters coming?

7/21/21, 9:27 PM
@bmax definitely, whether continuing this story or just the same universe :)
7/21/21, 8:21 PM
This is a kind of story I absolutely love, but selfishly, I wanted you to slow down and flesh out some of the details of the mental transformations. I hope you write more stories in this vein, but just pace them a bit differently, to give us time to get to know the characters and get into their heads a little bit more.

7/21/21, 9:26 PM
@Hypnothrill thanks for the feedback! This was my first time putting pen to paper all these infections I've had in my head for so long. Maybe next time I'll focus more intimately on just a few characters to add more depth to each character's takeover.
7/21/21, 9:13 PM
I like how it's not everything go as planed, while the doctor were in control (of Brendan), there are still things he can't control and was pushed to go deeper then he planed.
7/21/21, 8:20 PM
This story should continue. It did leave us at the end of this part here.
7/21/21, 8:00 PM
Fun, neat story! Solid entry to the contest :)