Recent Comments

7/12/21, 9:29 PM
I really wish I could be a boy in that world. Love the story!
7/12/21, 7:51 PM
Great ending! Love the domestic setup!
7/12/21, 5:54 PM
You had me at lampshading your own typo. This was so cute! Very *Six Characters In Search of an Author* energy. Fun, light, and very well executed.

7/12/21, 7:21 PM
Here's the weirdest part @Noam de Pluma: I went back and *added* the typo when the punchline just... appeared.
7/12/21, 3:09 PM
This was fantastic! Such a clever fun twist and a joy to read. Now how can i sign up for those notification tweets...

7/12/21, 7:20 PM
Hah, I had a feeling someone was gonna ask that @redwood! I don't have a Twitter for my author persona. I'm way too afraid I'll accidentally tweet the wrong thing on my main account.
7/12/21, 1:59 AM
Brilliant story! Meta, funny, and yet still hot!

7/12/21, 7:19 PM
Thanks @Max Lode! I'm super happy to see that the meta wasn't a huge turnoff for folks.
7/11/21, 11:01 PM
Loved this very creative, amusing story! I'm a big fan, Derek, and look forward to where your creativity leads you next. Thanks for writing.

7/12/21, 7:18 PM
Thank ye' @Hypnoguy67! I was feeling some writers block, hopefully getting a little weird clears that out.
7/12/21, 4:47 PM
Holy fuck this is a great story. Jesus Christ. You deserve to win the whole contest.

7/12/21, 7:15 PM
@Norismo Thank you so much! Glad you enjoyed :)
Anonymous
7/12/21, 6:35 PM
wonderful story. Would love to see what else mr Jabour is up to :)
7/12/21, 4:40 PM
so, Jorge and John ended up together?

Anonymous
7/12/21, 6:15 PM
@darkblade2814 Nope, John and Penelope; John was just surprised Jorge was there and wanted to catch up.

7/12/21, 6:19 PM
@The Author (name hidden due to challenge) I got it, the pharsing was a bit ambigous, but I'm not a native speaker of English, so I may be mistaken
7/12/21, 11:18 AM
I'm a sucker for cutesy endings. I will say the pacing feels off for me, it wraps up very quickly, but I like the back-story for Hunter, and his relationship with his parents. Honestly the part where the family is just looking at the tabloid photos is my favourite part of the whole thing. Also, I thought Ollie was going to end up with John. There are enough characters to make another chapter, or twelve. Hope this story continues! It kind of feels like the start of a sit-com. Penelope can cause some mischief.

Anonymous
7/12/21, 6:14 PM
@Norismo Yup. When I decided to try to write the idea out, there was only a day left in the contest. For me, that means there was basically only time to write a first draft, have one second view time, and a basic edit (not much more than a spell check). I did make some decisions to minimize my want-to-make-massive-edits-mode, but it definitely affected the pacing. John was a purposeful mislead, since I felt like if it were too obvious, the whole gameshow part could feel like a long, boring exposition dump where no gay stuff could happen until after it.