Recent Comments

3/21/21, 4:31 PM
It's a go idea ;D But yes, I think the end is a little rush, maybe you can also add something on what happen when Elijah and Jacob meet at the motel or if the other soldiers will meet him sometime later... in the end is a great story with some twist i didn't expect... maybe some edition to add more details or split in a couple of chapters will be great ;D hope you do, I will love to read more on this :3 💙💙💙
3/21/21, 4:28 PM
That was an intense exercise in steady, persistent corruption! Re: identifying characters by their hair colour, I thought it might have been a little over-emphasised. Anyway I hope this story does really well in the contest!
3/21/21, 4:05 PM
I agree with the Hurried comment. I quite understand it as I do so myself. I want to get the story out and reviewed, then once on line, I see all the errors anyone else would have seen on first read. Also, I'm guessing this was written by speech-to-text or Google translate, given the semantic and grammar errors. I love the concept and progression and with a wee bit of editing would be a fantastic story. Good job, overall
3/21/21, 3:52 PM
Hot story! I recognise the style of this one, and I really enjoy many of your other works.
Anonymous
3/21/21, 3:35 PM
This story was so hot, thank you so much! With this being the happy ending, any chance for us to get a taste of the bad one?
BPtime
3/21/21, 3:32 PM
My estimate is that Ben won't make it. There's no way stopping the power of water. I bet he'll come to daddy. And then with daddy, and Parker. A nagging thought: what happened to the people that repaired the pump? Didn't they taste of the water? And if so, wouldn't they roam around in search for further hydration?
3/21/21, 2:53 PM
want to read more like this w/genie magic but unable to access patreon or buy anything since don't have debit/credit card......bummer
3/21/21, 2:43 PM
Ridiculously hot! Great first effort, and I hope a great start... LLOYD
TimTim
3/21/21, 2:20 PM
The hunger Chase has for the pollen at the end is hot! Can't wait for the next part and Chase becoming a beefy biker.
Anonymous
3/21/21, 1:43 PM
excellent