Recent Comments

Jul 5, 2020
Anonymous
7/5/20, 10:40 PM
Not too bad. I kind of liked it but felt the transformation and the sexual relationship at the end was a bit rushed. It would have been nice to see them get a little more together, or him show signs of being more 'masculine' than simply stating, 'now you are masculine.' But that's just personal taste. For a more 'objective' one, whenever someone new is speaking put their quote on a new line. Something like, "James asked, “Can I help you?” Brick took a huge haul off of his cigar and blew the smoke in James’ face saying, “I doubt it, short stack. But I know I can help you!” Brick was smirking as he placed the cigar back in his jaw." looks like James is saying both the first and second set of quotations. It'd be easier to read if it was: James asked, “Can I help you?” Brick took a huge haul off of his cigar and blew the smoke in James’ face saying, “I doubt it, short stack. But I know I can help you!” Brick was smirking as he placed the cigar back in his jaw. Otherwise not a bad first story.
7/5/20, 10:07 PM
Great storyline and it got me hard immediately! Gotta read more so keep going. You do great work!!!
7/5/20, 9:59 PM
Very hot! I loved it.
Jul 5, 2020
7/5/20, 9:58 PM
Storyline is HOT, descriptions are solid, you got me hard & thick real fast! keep going, I want to read more!
7/5/20, 9:38 PM
Great story looking forward to part 3 next week .
Anonymous
7/5/20, 9:31 PM
LOVED THIS STORY.
7/5/20, 9:11 PM
Rook seems like a cool guy. At 5 or so pounds less than Strong... that means he started around 195. Fuck, he thinks that's skinny.
Jul 5, 2020
7/5/20, 9:05 PM
It was a nice and interesting story. As mattersonline mentioned, the end felt kinda rushed, but the rest of the story is cool (I was also able to check some of your tumblr stories, and I liked them). As a fan of cigar and smoke stories myself, it's always great to meet others with the same interests. Keep writing and stay safe :D
Jul 5, 2020
7/5/20, 8:33 PM
Thanks everyone. Appreciate the support and critique. I would agree with you mattersonline. That is something I will have to work on when posting here, considering my method of using images to inspire the storyline and push the narrative. I can depend on those for too much to fill in the blanks. I can definitely take a little more time to flesh things out. Also, thank you Martin for giving us a space to explore and share.
DaddyLover
7/5/20, 8:04 PM
@Udems, I do agree that the memory restoring scene could've used a few more words and paragraphs and maybe get more insight inside Roger's mind as he got to this decision. As for him being out of character for crying and coming to this decision, I strongly disagree on that point. It's been clearly established that Roger was falling for Mr. Kent for several chapters now and I don't think he's a bad person at heart so it was only natural for him for feeling guilty about taking advantage of him. I don't know if you've also ever been rejected by a guy you've liked before but I thought Jo really nailed that one in the head because I really related to it, especially when Roger was with Mike and all he wanted was just to cry.