Recent Comments

6/26/20, 6:27 AM
Wowza. Loved it.
6/26/20, 6:04 AM
In Greek Mythology, there is the story of the SIRENS. They were dangerous creatures, who lured nearby sailors with their singing voices to shipwreck on a rocky coast. This is the story behind the story that Ready to Change has given us here. I read this as a test composition. Ready to Change putting down in words the notes he has been hearing in his head. Would anyone else be tempted by this melody? I can tell you that I certainly was. I over looked the lapses in the plot, because I bought into the story early on. One clever writing devise is not to name the anti-hero. By not giving him a name, we automatically insert our own name into the story. That's exactly the point. We, like the ancient sailors, are sucked into the plot. If this was intentional or accidental, doesn't matter. It shows great narrative skills. Sometimes, the shorter and simpler the composition is the better test of talent.
6/26/20, 4:57 AM
nice chapter..though I really would like to see you go back to the diapers like in part 1. I think that would make the story alot better because we don't see that many diaper stories
6/26/20, 3:17 AM
I always loved Tony and would always love a chapter showing how his life ended up being does he meet another man, does he find a top, etc.
6/26/20, 2:24 AM
Love this concept! I'm eager for more chapters
6/26/20, 12:49 AM
> What bothers me is not knowing what’s in that shampoo. > Cycle One (King Rex's cum).... hahaha wrong universe
6/26/20, 12:43 AM
The slight twist was hot. So yeah great fun story!
nycboot
6/26/20, 12:30 AM
I agree with BlindSeer0's observation - 4 homophobes turn into 4 gay stereotypes. We don't see any sex so whether they're top or bottom (to me) seems a minor issue, insofar as it affects their stereotype characterization. And I think using the top/bottom category is not quite right in this case because it doesn't affect people's personality. Tony is a bottom but is very extrovert (hate to say it but I've met plenty of Tonys). You'd think the big hulky Mark would be a top but no, he's not only a bottom but a real kind of sub/slave mentality, totally dependent on his top/Master. In any case, that aspect of the story never bothered me. What bothers me is not knowing what's in that shampoo. :)
6/25/20, 11:59 PM
I also liked the realty changes to his physical changes. Well done. I wish there were no women involved, but something had to lure in the pig hetero . I look forward to the next chapters
6/25/20, 11:56 PM
i always assumed it was because the punishments are karmic. This is a common thing in Onyx's work, at least from what I've noticed. All 4 guys are rich, powerful, and successful. They consider themselves smarter than others (and thus why they're successful), and think that everyone else is either dumb or lazy. They're also all homophobic, and reduce gay people down to stereotypes: young, vapid, and obsessed with muscle and sex. So in the end they all get blue collar jobs (or at least low level positions that don't require higher education), have no ambitions beyond sex and muscle, and become young himbos. Specifically: Tony resents people of his ethnicity who play into stereotypes, so he of course becomes that very stereotype. Mark is toxicly masculine, sexist and homophobic. He often lashes out at others for not acting how he expects and enforces it by being larger and stronger than most people, which he got through practical work. Because of this he becomes a sub who listens to the man he abused, bottoms ("the girl in the relationship"), has no ambition beyond doing what he's told, and is a mass of impractical muscle that only exists to show it off for others. Jarod is interesting in that while he ends up arguably more blue collar than the others and just as muscular, he seems to be more aware of what's happening. He's also a dominant top. That part is probably because he was the lackey, the one who listened to the others, so when they become more subservient, he becomes more dominant. But he was also the only one who tried to stop Mark's abuse of the gay man. Sure, he still has homophobic beliefs, but here doesn't want to be confrontational or actually hurt anyone. so i think the reason he was affected the way he was was because of that kindness and the fact that he was kind of a victim of the other three, after a fashion.