Recent Comments

Anonymous
4/8/20, 1:46 AM
I love your stories so much! I can't wait for the next one
Jay
4/7/20, 11:41 PM
On fire. I think Rob is ready for the second, third, and forth act of the show. Who knows, perhaps Rob should be featured in a National X-Rated Hypnosis Show tour.
Cracker
4/7/20, 11:37 PM
gelded_alpha@outlook.com I thought I had it in opening
Anonymous
4/7/20, 10:34 PM
hmmmm can't email ah well
Anonymous
4/7/20, 10:17 PM
i wish I could I'm just no good at story writing 😭
4/7/20, 10:01 PM
the way the story was written, was a bit of a turn off but I did finish the story and did enjoy it. there was one point where you called Micheal, Patrick?
Anonymous
4/7/20, 9:34 PM
dam so hot though does need a sequel hehe
4/7/20, 8:57 PM
Hypnothrill, thanks for the input. Your comment is timely. While writing this story, I wanted to expand beyond Joe's thoughts and observations and knew I did not have a good handle on it. I had never heard of omniscient 3rd person. I just briefly looked it up and will look into it more. I'm thankful you mentioned it. It was a roadblock for me in this story, both writing it and re-reading it. Part 2 is already done so will be the same style. But I am going to explore this omniscient 3rd person and develop it better.
4/7/20, 8:30 PM
Nice one and extremely hot! Definitely deserves the 5 for "Wanking material" Agree with TDS above about the development of Yannick's character although I know it's always harder in a first person writing style to give insight into another character's thoughts.