Recent Comments

Anonymous
12/27/18, 4:39 PM
You gotta keep writing this story out! Sure Pat's indoctrination is complete, or is it! The 'sex factory' apparently has different levels that requires different training. You could get Glenn to cough up more money to choose a different option. From there, maybe he gets to fuck Pat, one on one, and possibly liberate him or 'buy him'. I should write this next chapter. LOL!
Anonymous
12/27/18, 4:13 PM
ops, my cellphone legged and posted my comment 3 times,
Anonymous
12/27/18, 4:11 PM
I wonder what is going to happen to the other
Anonymous
12/27/18, 4:11 PM
I wonder what is going to happen to the other officers
Anonymous
12/27/18, 4:11 PM
I wonder what is going to happen to the other officers
Anonymous
12/27/18, 3:54 PM
Great story, keep it going
Anonymous
12/27/18, 3:40 PM
If nothing else, I'm curious how a "15 years later" chapter would turn out, where Pat's time is up and he has to return to the real world again. Good story so far!
Anonymous
12/27/18, 3:25 PM
more of this story line plz 😍
12/27/18, 3:11 PM
I'm not a native-English speaker myself, so I'm not really qualified to comment on your English. As far as I can tell, it's pretty much perfect. I didn't find any obvious mistake, with the exception of very(!) few typos. As a matter of fact, you have a talent for writing in a way it makes your story very easy to read. Usually I don't like long texts, I rather get to the point quickly (see my own stories ... :) ). But you have an incredible way of keeping the reader interested, to always top the already hot description of Mowgli's loss of will, so you just cannot stop reading. I was hard throughout your whole story and that was really special. I can only commend you for that! If I had to criticize anything, it's the way you write dialog - from a technical point of view. In (American) English, you put each speaker into its own separate paragraph i.e. every time another person starts to speak, you start a new paragraph. And you don't use any - or * when starting a direct speech. That actually makes it much easier to read dialog, even though it makes the text even longer. But I would still follow that rule. I haven't had the time to read your second story, and I'm almost afraid that it'll be hard even for you to top the first one :) Well, I feel your mind just works quite similar to my own wicked, corrupted mind, so I'm looking forward to whatever you're going to offer here.
12/27/18, 3:04 PM
I haven't posted any new image-stories since the great Tumblr purge, but my Tumblr is all archived at: https://www.timbr.xxx/hypnothrill