Recent Comments

5/13/18, 2:00 PM
Thanks Hypnothrill(Long time fan :-) ) Thanks for that. I have quite a few ideas for James' adventures etc and am building on some of those things. I was looking at the dialogue and agree with you. i'll keep an eye on it.
5/13/18, 1:54 PM
This is a great set-up, Tattcub, and it's got me eager to read what comes next. I hope you include a lot of descriptions of the happily drugged Priapus Pictures pornstars, maybe some scenes where James talks to them and gets creeped out by how dumb and happy they seem. Then of course I'm sure Saul will snare James as well--maybe by drugging his water. Eventually maybe even James, now happily working for Priapus Pictures, could somehow bring Manny back into the fold. One suggestion, though: I think you're a really good dialogue writer, but that dialogue would be easier to read if you left a blank line between each paragraph.
May 12, 2018
Anonymous
5/13/18, 12:11 PM
Great story .Wish I could get some of those pills!
Anonymous
5/13/18, 10:34 AM
Why didn’t they shave his balls? I missed the point there. At first I thought Travis would fo it himself but I don’t believe that’s the case.
5/13/18, 9:52 AM
This is meant to be the only version. Which is why I said it at the top. Just want to get to story together. In all honesty real life has been so rough for a while I've found it difficult to start writing again and wanted something familiar to get on with. I thought re-posting it might give it some new life for me. It will speed up as the changes progress. Pretty much at that point now so I might shift perspectives a little. Thanks for the comment nycboot. Very much appreciated. TC
May 10, 2018
Lexorius
5/13/18, 7:24 AM
OK again. Thank you for your Help and also for this Story. *bighugs* :)) now, this looks better.
May 10, 2018
Lexorius
5/13/18, 7:21 AM
Argh... My handydictionary don't like when i try to write english :))
May 10, 2018
Lexorius
5/13/18, 7:19 AM
Thank you for YouTube Help and also die thus Story. :)) *Big hugs*
nycboot
5/13/18, 5:59 AM
Gee you have so many versions of this. Sometimes you just gotta get it down, spend a few days proofreading, and then let it go and not return to it. Coming from a family of medical professionals, I didn't mind the slow exposition - that's how it works. I like the idea (somehow it reminds me of the cheesy movie "Lawnmower Man") and look forward to seeing how it progresses (though I hope the protagonist doesn't end up like Byron).
May 12, 2018
nycboot
5/13/18, 5:56 AM
Very nice story. I also enjoyed this more than My Black Neighbor, although I agree with AgainstMyWill's comments. Again, very nice story.