Recent Comments

Anonymous
4/25/17, 1:26 PM
That was terrific....thanks
lloyd311@aol.com
4/25/17, 12:52 PM
Maybe? You gotta! It's just great. Please continue...
VRL
4/25/17, 12:21 PM
Hmm how many stories have we seen where the villain loses, heroes ride off into the sunset victorious,i mean edlam made his main character a minor character and his villain into a protagonist,that takes major balls,and dont tell me alex isnt the protagonist right now,weve moved all our focus from jake to alex,following his motivations and evil doing(protagonists can be bad too eg god of war,heavy rain,shadow of the colossus etc) alex even has an antagonist in the story,unbeknownst to him for now, If edlam wants to take his story one way who are we,his fans to tell him not to go the way he wants to,and maybe Alex gets his in the end,maybe not,who cares,its edlams choice not ours
Golf
4/25/17, 11:18 AM
I think it's very funny. if you feel disgusted, don't read it. that's all. it's like a movie. you don't like it, move on with your life. let others read it. oh i forgot some people love to read love story. hahahah
AeonFlux
4/25/17, 10:37 AM
Keep on writing...........and I need some of the same dosis......;-)
Anonymous
4/25/17, 10:24 AM
Please continue with maybe some of his friends
Oct 3, 2016
Anonymous
4/25/17, 8:40 AM
please process me it was so sexy to read that story
Anonymous
4/25/17, 7:28 AM
Too many characters to remember, though your writing is great. Alex needs to be punished in the end.
Anonymous
4/25/17, 5:06 AM
I love Edlam's work -- but agree with some of the earlier comments that at least for this reader it would be easier to not have too many plotlines to keep track of. It reminds me of some of the nifty stories where there are 35 separate chapters. My own preference is for no more than 4-5 chapters that bring the story to closure. It's almost like you have enough material but it would be more manageable to follow if you did on story about alex and jake, another story about alex and the cops, but don't keep them all running together. Last comment, for me it's all about the original abuser getting caught up in his own empire and losing control to others that he originally enslaved -- e.g., pecking order by webb025. All this is meant as constructive feedback -- the main feedback is AWESOME JOB!!!!
Oct 3, 2016
BostonSatyr
4/25/17, 4:16 AM
this is an excellent story. would love to see this idea expanded upon. say in a police station, o firehouse, or in an armed forces environment