Recent Comments

Anonymous
4/16/17, 3:46 AM
It's the problem with 'multi-character' plot lines. In variably, you lose a character or two and then when they re-appear, it doesn't read convincingly. Peter, arrested, charged, and somehow, let go, would be an interesting plot line. It would allow the writer to take up different characters, finish off some characters, let the episodic nature of the story continue.
4/16/17, 3:02 AM
@Wang and first anon poster: All I'll say is that by virtue of where the story's gone, I obviously have to write Peter out for a bit, but I'm certainly not going to write him out for long. :) @Second anon poster: TBH, I never really thought of putting them in one way or the other. They're hot fuck-buddies for Peter, but with the exception of Scott, the people at the party are the ones Peter hypnotizes most often, so it made sense for them to be there. With him having to give suggestions to that many people at once, he'd want most of the party guests to be the guys that are the most easily controlled. The next chapter will cover what's going on with Lucas and his father in more detail, though, once I come back to this story.
Anonymous
4/16/17, 2:31 AM
interesting how lucas isnt there at the party. Did he and his father escape the web of trust???. Anyway thanks for writing such a hot story.
4/16/17, 2:16 AM
Lovely!
Anonymous
4/16/17, 1:59 AM
I'm out of money right now, but I'm definitely interested, sounds very promising.
Apr 14, 2017
4/16/17, 1:49 AM
Excellent. Lovely build-up. Your story made me think that the turn on is not the sex (which is incidental) but the transformation - that's the ultimate turn on! Wonderful!
Donkbutt
4/15/17, 10:05 PM
Yah it's doing that thing again where the story stays at the top of the list, even though other stories are being updated. Possibly a bug in the forums?
Anonymous
4/15/17, 8:28 PM
It's the touch of realism and fantasy that made your story hot. Loved it!
Anonymous
4/15/17, 6:42 PM
Well this just got more interesting. I hope this leads to a happy ending for all of them tho.
Anonymous
4/15/17, 4:09 PM
The person commenting repeatedly about the cops and coaches is obviously the same person. You're not clever or sly. Great story, very fun and enjoyable.