Recent Comments

Marty
2/4/17, 6:04 AM
Wait a minute. Phillipe = horse lover. Equus = horse. Phil = Groundhog. Groundhog Day was yesterday. WTF?
Anonymous
2/4/17, 5:09 AM
When a story garners this many comments, it must good -- if only to get people thinking.
TheWanderer
2/4/17, 3:45 AM
I was so worried that Paul was the one that's doing the mind control by I'm very glad that it wasn't XD Very good! Can't wait for the next one
Anonymous
2/4/17, 3:04 AM
@Wesly Bracken Love your stories, understandable why you won't post here but it's still a shame to hear. Have the name of that serious on CYOC that you mentioned?
Nick Bottom
2/4/17, 1:07 AM
You'll get more comments on the next part, I promise. Good job here!
Anonymous
2/4/17, 12:18 AM
Waiting for Chapter 2!!!
Lenny
2/3/17, 11:24 PM
It is a bit different and may appeal to some more and some less __ that is a good thing. Your a great writer! The hair stuff was both creepy and hot; that takes talent to do.
xORRiNx
2/3/17, 11:05 PM
Anonymous: Austin TX is great! I love the guys in the gym ;) Wesley: The feedback helped greatly. I've always loved reading your work! :)
Anonymous
2/3/17, 10:45 PM
#MakeEroticaGreatAgain #Trump2020
2/3/17, 10:37 PM
Ha, from the comments I thought this was going to be waaaayyyy worse than it actually is! This is why I don't post stuff on this site anymore. It's a very good story, but I think the issues that people are having with it come from some genre wires getting crossed. The story starts out pointing in the direction of a comic development--in the Greek sense--a story with a comeuppance, but always a happy ending of sorts. Just reading that intro/setup, you're expecting him to suffer some abuse, but come out of it with broader empathy and probably a hot roommate to fuck around with. It keeps this tone until about halfway through, when it just goes full tragedy, with no offer of redemption for Taylor at all. I don't think this is a "wrong" choice, but I think if you had telegraphed the horror of the ending a bit better, it wouldn't have felt so jarring. For example, if Taylor, at the beginning of the story, had been a closeted gay guy, who joined in with his straight bro friends in crashing the protest--but Sam recognized something about him from a profile on Grindr--a tattoo say--it would have been set up as a revenge trope, and the horror and tragedy of the ending would have "fit" better. It's about managing reader expectations, in a sense. All that said, I think what you have here is much, much more interesting than that example. It reminds me of this odd branch of an interactive over on CYOC, where a curse causes gay guys to become stereotypical, "straight", homophobic men, whenever they become horny. It feels really wrong, in some sense, but there's an attraction in that wrongness that I think deserves to be explored. I think your instincts here are really on point, but it needed a bit more finesse to pull off.