Recent Comments

Andrew
7/8/16, 2:29 AM
I love your story, hard to find gay-to-straight story here and it kind of unique, please continue it. Cheers 😀
Anonymous
7/7/16, 9:31 PM
LOVE this story! love the funhouse tf stories and to see whats coming to them! I think this story was a good length, but if you want to try out a shorter one maybe a part 2?? :)
Anonymous
7/7/16, 9:05 PM
I hope the next chapter is in the works. Love this!
Baralai
7/7/16, 9:04 PM
I love the story and I also love the constructive critique! Keep writing I do want to see more of this and more!
Laryagar
7/7/16, 9:00 PM
While I like the idea of the character Toby and the method in which he obtains revenge, my critique is more about the actual choices in humiliation and the way characters react. It seems the situations feel staged and the characters reactions are a bit too extreme. The hairiness I would imagine could easily be acted on as a medical condition and treated. In fact the "minuteman" could also be treated as well medically. I have not read the rest of the author's stories but this is the reaction to this particular story. I believe it is the way the characters react that does not seem to feel natural. I think comes down to the character being humiliated would have a reaction like this or worse, that much could be seen at the very least the internal dialogue. It is the way the other people react that seems off, almost like a scene from the humiliated person's worst nightmare reaction, which is rarely the case with real people.
Charles
7/7/16, 8:02 PM
Thanks for the kind words. I appreciate the feedback.
Txz
7/7/16, 7:46 PM
Have to admit, as much as I like and look forward to your stories, the length of this one made we loose interest. Got a little confusing and tedious. Breaking it up would have helped.
Anonymous
7/7/16, 5:58 PM
For me breaking them up helps with story. It often helps build the anticipation of the outcome
screamingmoist
7/7/16, 5:23 PM
Thanks for reading! This one went a little longer than anticipated. Which leads me to ask: for stories of this length, is it better to break into shorter chapters or post as a whole? Went back and forth on that.
Ken
7/7/16, 5:02 PM
LOVED it. Would be neat to continue on with another group or even to see where everything is going with this group. Or even combine groups to see what happens. Can't wait for more of your stories..It was just GREAT!!!