Recent Comments

Anonymous
6/4/16, 8:40 AM
It says something about Orrins writing that he can stir up the crowd to get more responses then I have ever seen on any story on this site. Whether you like it or not, "Bravo!"
Anonymous
6/4/16, 6:27 AM
Matt turning into a dominant rough Alpha was hot. Backfire for Hannah..Makes Matt abusive towards her.Matt gets muscle bound,and more aggressive,prefers to get off on fucking gay guys,using and abusing Logan,effectively turning GAY. Logan loves his submissive role,Matts dominance.
Texmandex@gmail.com
6/4/16, 6:06 AM
Spandexlad, I couldn't agree more with you and your suggestions for how I could have made these stories better. In all fairness, I wrote them when I was in college, almost 15 years ago. I thought my manuscripts were long gone; but just last week I found an old CD with both stories. I posted them exactly as I found them. You raise good points about the narrative being cumbersome to read in some places. Maybe one of these days I'll break out my "red pen" and pare both stories down a bit. Honestly, I'm just happy I found both of them. Glad you enjoyed reading them.
Anonymous
6/4/16, 5:17 AM
^^... With some strictly no-homo real-man-on-real-man action on the side. :-)
Anonymous
6/4/16, 5:01 AM
I thought the best consequence and punishment for Hanna was to Matt turn Logan his best jock bro and reestablish a new dumb jock bro friendship with him, which ended up 24/7 hunting girls.
Anonymous
6/4/16, 4:57 AM
Great story, as usual!! Interesting twists. A little predicable, but that did not hurt the story.
Spandexlad
6/4/16, 4:36 AM
I love this story and the one that came before it. I even slid into my wrestling singlet to read it for a 2nd time. That being said the story needs a little work. You shift from 1st person to 3rd person a few times and there are so many boys to keep up with and the side switching happens so fast that it gets a little confusing and hard to keep up with. You might want to consider slowing down the switching of sides and beef up the suspense of who is on what side. Keep people on one side for longer, I mean some of the same things keep happening to some of the characters that maybe really needs to only happen once. And let us relish in what it's like to be on one side. Several times I was like "Yay, he's a gay spandex slave, let's get into it" only to have him saved before there is any meat on the bone. Maybe breaking up the story into more chapters and switching between narrators will help. That way you can talk about what the guys who aren't Matt are doing and have a different narrator every time you start a new chapter (labeling the chapter with their name). Also there are a few times where the antidote seems useless that I wonder why they cling onto this plan that the antidote will save them. This are just some ideas, take them or leave them. Just please tell me what happens in that locked down school. I'm dying to know. I hope Matt ends up like Chad. :)
ZC6201
6/4/16, 12:35 AM
This is very difficult to read, sadly. Don't be afraid to double space or space out chunks.
A CONCERNED READER
6/3/16, 11:18 PM
I LIKED THIS STORY VERY MUCH : ONLY WISH IT WAS LONGER...ORRIN HAS A KNACK FOR WRITING ABOUT HOMOPHOBIC BRO'S THAT I FIND VERY SEXY..KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK ! THE 'NEW' MATT SHOULD COME BACK FOR MORE HEAVY BULLYING & HOT SEX WITH LOGAN..& LOGAN SHOULD FIND HE LIKES THEIR NEW RELATIONSHIP !!!
Anonymous
6/3/16, 11:09 PM
i like how people think it is wrongor darker to turn someone into an homophobic raper but are ok with turning people into worthless slut xD